Taken by the Buck Read online

  Cane had no idea what to say, so I kept talking. I wasn’t sure if he thought I’d insinuated he was my mate. And If I didn’t say it all soon, I’d lose my nerve. “If I go home now, I’m a failure.” I dissolved into tears. “I can’t go back alone.”

  No doe had ever come home without their mate. They found their buck and mated, or they didn’t come home at all. No one in the herd expected to see me until spring. If I couldn’t keep the tradition alive, no one could. The rest of the girls thought it was too old-fashioned. I’d been dreaming about finding my mate ever since I sat in my grandma’s lap and she read me the story of our herd. If I failed, all my dreams were a lie. Everything I’d ever believed wasn’t true. The shame was something I couldn’t bear.

  Cane rubbed my back as I cried, and I didn’t shy away from him. Soon, he had his arms around me, and I tried to catch my breath against his shoulder. “What do you want to do?” he murmured against my filthy hair.

  “I want to take a shower.” I knew he still wasn’t sure what to make of me or my story, but at least he seemed kind. “Can I borrow something to wear?”

  “Yeah.” He jumped up off the bed and started opening drawers in the dresser with the mirror. He handed me a T-shirt and sweatpants. “Let me show you where the bathroom is.”

  Chapter Three

  BEST. SHOWER. EVER.

  My skin had been crusted with dried shifting goo, and I’d felt the same way as I did with a bad cold. The warm water ran off of me, filthy as it went down the drain. I caught myself inhaling the smell of Cane’s peppermint shampoo, wishing I was bold enough to really touch him instead of cry against his shoulder. I could flirt with the best of them, but I never went any further than that with anyone. They weren’t my mate.

  “Where’s your bow?” One side of Cane’s mouth turned up when I came out from the bathroom. He’d only flicked his eyes away from the hockey game on TV. I held a towel in front of me, he’d given me a white T-shirt and I wasn’t completely dry.

  “It was dirty.” I wasn’t feeling like such a prize anymore, and I’d abandoned it on the sink.

  “We’ll wash it.” Cane found this all way more amusing than I did. “You really don’t want to go home?”

  I shook my head, even though I wanted that more than anything. I wished I could go back in time and be excited about the anticipation of The Mate instead of knowing this was my fate. I wanted to see my grandma and know I was safe.

  “Sticking to that deer story, huh?” He rubbed his beard. I glared at him. “Okay.” he shrugged.

  “It’s not a story,” I insisted. I pulled my legs against my chest, attempting to ignore him, and tried to remember the rules of hockey. “You saw me shift, and I can’t go home.”

  Cane sighed, probably sorry he got himself involved with me. The house guest who wouldn’t leave. “Tell me more about this mating thing.”

  “I already told you,” I said. He might have been testing me, to make sure I told him the same story twice. Or he was probably hoping it was something kinky. “We shift to doe when we’re ready to mate with the buck we’re fated to be with. The tradition is to go out on Halloween night, but I couldn’t wait. I got excited, and I thought maybe I’d find him early.”

  Cane tilted his head. “So, is there like a specific goal, besides some weird mating ritual?” He seemed more interested now that he realized the whole thing had to do with sex. He’d turned toward me, a pillow against his chest. “Do you know who you’re looking for?”

  “The goal is babies,” I said, and Cane’s eyes widened. “And no, we have no idea who we’re looking for. We don’t know until we both shift into our deer form.”

  “No offense, but that’s pretty messed up.” Cane ignored my glare. “You’re expected to bang some random deer and you’re not allowed to go home until you’re knocked up?”

  Well, when he put it like that, it did sound pretty suspect. “It’s our tradition.” I almost added that I was in heat, but that would be too much right now.

  “And that doesn’t bother you?” He raised an eyebrow. “Don’t you want to choose your own husband? Or boyfriend? Husband’s jumping off the deep end, don’t you think?”

  “It’s romantic!” I picked up one of the other pillows and threw it at him. He caught it and tossed it back at me. “Not all of us can have a cold, dead heart.”

  “And live in reality?”

  “Whatever, Mr. I Smoked Myself Stupid last night.” I got up and whacked him with the pillow. He laughed. I’d planned to storm off, but then I remembered I had no place to go. About that. I flopped back down on the couch.

  “Sure, Ms. or is that Mrs. I Was a Deer and Now I’m a Chick?” Our eyes locked, and I knew he thought I was crazy. Or something.

  It hurt to look away, but I forced myself to watch hockey. “Don’t call me a chick.”

  “Okay, sweetheart.”

  If looks could kill, well, he’d still be grinning at me, probably. Ugh. “It’s Chloe.” I buried my face in my hands in frustration.

  Cane laughed. “I’m sorry.” I picked my head back up to give him another dirty look, but he’d completely softened, and oh man, he felt sorry for me. This kept getting worse. “Let’s start over.”

  “Okay.” I’d expected him to kick me out. He didn’t seem to believe a word I said, yet he saw what I’d done with his own eyes. If that didn't convince him, there was nothing I could say to help my cause. “Tell me about you.”

  He didn’t relax like I’d expected him to. It looked like I wasn’t the only one with secrets. “What do you want to know?”

  “What did you do in New York?” New York City fascinated me, I’d never been far from Woodland Park. It seemed so glamorous, even if Cane was anything but. He was raw and frustrating and I hated to admit that I liked it.

  “I played in a band.” That explained the guitar, but he didn’t elaborate. Maybe he didn’t like talking about himself, but we’d talked about me enough already.

  “What band?”

  “Altered Haze?” he asked, as if he didn’t expect me to know who they were. But Altered Haze was one of my favorites. They weren’t huge, but I’d found them on YouTube and watched all their videos because they had a sexy guitar player. And I didn’t realize I was sitting in his dusty, cluttered little cabin.

  “You look different,” I squinted at Cane, to make sure I wasn’t confusing him with someone else, “with the beard. I didn’t realize you were Hurricane Lopez.” I was going to try my hardest not to fangirl. The things this guy could do to a guitar, I looked at his fingers and tried stop imagining them on my body.

  “Does that change things for you?” He grinned, since I’d squeaked a little when I said his name. Bastard.

  “No.” He squashed any excitement I’d had about him being in the band. I almost told him he should really get a haircut and shave, but I still wanted to know how soft that beard was. “I was really sorry to hear about Ransom.”

  Their singer, Ransom Lewis, died of a drug overdose a few months ago. He’d collapsed on stage, in the middle of a concert. Twenty thousand fans looked on as the EMTs tried and failed to revive him. Reporters had hounded the band afterward, hoping for quotes, and I remembered the pain in Cane’s eyes every time they showed him on video. That look was back now, he was totally lost.

  “He was my best friend,” Cane said quietly. “I don’t know if I want to make music without him.”

  No wonder he’d been so frustrated playing guitar earlier. The missing piece of that song was something he was never going to find.

  “Is that why you came back to Colorado?” I had to steer the conversation back to someplace happy.

  He nodded. “Yeah. I wanted to get back to basics. Away from all the bullshit.” He ran his hand over his beard like he knew I was thinking about doing the same thing. “This is my uncle’s cabin. No one’s used it for years.”

  “I can kind of tell.” Without meaning to, I wrinkled my nose. “I can help you clean it up if you want.” br />
  Some of the light came back to his eyes. “You’re really not going anywhere, are you?”

  “Do you want me to go?” I held my breath waiting for his answer. After all, he kept bringing it up.

  “No.”

  Chapter Four

  CANE CERTAINLY LOVED watching sports, and he’d found one game after another to watch. He’d switched from hockey to football. “This isn’t even a live game!” I exclaimed.

  “They didn’t show it locally last weekend.” It seemed like he always had the guitar in his lap. He didn’t pay complete attention to either the instrument or the game, and sometimes I caught him looking at me, but then he’d strum the guitar instead of saying anything. Now he motioned toward the TV. “I’ve been looking forward to this. They’re going to take that quarterback out at halftime, and the second stringer is going to kill it.”

  I actually liked football, but I wanted to tease him about it, so I pretended I had no idea what he was talking about. “But you know what happens already. Why bother?”

  That half smile was back, the one where he thought I was crazy. “I like everything that goes into the game. The strategy. The matchups.” Another strum of the guitar. “And you really don’t like things that are predictable, huh?”

  “Nope.” I had plenty of experience being challenged on my thoughts on The Mate, and he wasn’t giving me anything new.

  Cane winked. “I think we’re going to get along fine.”

  I started dozing off in the second half of the game Cane was so excited about. Every so often, he’d wake me cheering or grumbling about the play. “Sorry,” he said every time I jumped back to consciousness, and he really did try to keep it down, for a few plays.

  “It’s okay.” After all, I was squatting in his house. “Thanks for the blanket.” He’d pulled the plaid comforter from the bed at some point and draped it over me.

  “Why don’t you go to bed?” He took a sip of his beer.

  “Because it’s your bed,” I reminded him. “I can sleep out here.”

  He put down the beer and pulled the blanket off of me. “No. I’ll sleep out here. Come on.”

  I yawned. “Are you going to tuck me in?”

  He wanted to come back with something witty, I could tell, but I caught him totally off guard. There was something in his eyes I’d never seen before. “If that’s what you want.”

  I grabbed for the blanket, my hand landing on his. His energy flowed under my skin and my body went haywire. It was a sensation I wasn’t used to, but I had a feeling it might be addicting. “Keep the blanket. You need it.” I forced myself not to look back at him as I left the room.

  “Sweet dreams, Chloe.”

  Chapter Five

  THIS WAS HARDER THAN I ever imagined. Going out into the forest as a doe, I couldn’t exactly bring luggage with me. No matter when I was supposed to shift back to human, I would have been in this predicament. Having absolutely nothing. If I’d found my mate, I would’ve assumed I’d be able to go home. No one ever told us what was supposed to happen, and I hadn’t thought it through. We were supposed to find our mate and make babies. Those were the only instructions. I used to shush Daphne when she complained about this very thing, now I cursed her for being right. I had no clothes, no ID, no money, no way to do anything. And no one expected to see me until the spring.

  “I need to ask you a favor,” I said a couple mornings later over breakfast. Cane was actually full of surprises. Not only was he a vegan like me, he actually liked to cook. I sat at the table while he flipped pumpkin pancakes in an ancient looking skillet.

  I didn’t like to ask people for things, especially people I didn’t know, and especially not Cane. I already knew there would be strings attached.

  “What’s up?” He placed a plate overflowing with pancakes and maple syrup in front of me. My stomach purred in appreciation.

  “Can we do some shopping?” I’d been wearing his clothes for the last couple days. Cane insisted I put the pink bow back on, once it was clean. I felt even more ridiculous with the ribbon in a T-shirt down to my knees, sweatpants that ballooned around my legs, and nothing underneath.

  “Why?” Cane asked after he swallowed a bite of pancake. “I think you look pretty hot in that.”

  Of course he would. “I want something that fits. I’ll pay you back, when I can.” I’d been working hard to get things cleaned up around the cabin, in preparation of this conversation. And also because I couldn’t stand the clutter. It didn’t seem to bother Cane. I had no idea how long he’d been back here, but the place looked like no one had touched it for years.

  I knew I was pushing my luck, asking for anything, when Cane had already more than held up his end of the bargain. He hadn’t been expecting a roommate. Once the furniture had been dusted and things had been washed, it wasn’t half bad in here. Dated, and in desperate need of some softness, but not so gross anymore.

  He raised an eyebrow over his coffee cup. “Are you sure this isn’t some sort of scam?” he teased. “I’ll let you know now, all the band’s money is tied up in litigation. Apparently death isn’t a good reason to miss playing a show.” That faraway look was back in his eyes.

  “Do I look like a scammer?” I wanted to do anything to make that look go away, and everything that went with it.

  It worked. A smile spread across his face, and his eyes lit up, falling to his T-shirt on my body. “It would be a pretty solid plan. I’d absolutely fall for it.”

  “Good.” I mashed my lips together, trying not to laugh. “Does that mean we can get a few things?” Like underwear, but he’d never stop teasing me if I said that out loud. “I picked some stuff out already online.”

  “Did you?” He wasn’t mad, more amused than anything else.

  “I promise I’ll pay you back.” I poured more syrup over my pancakes. They were delicious.

  “You will.” The look in his eyes was something I had no experience with, and the warmth in my stomach had nothing to do with the coffee or pancakes. “I haven’t decided how yet.”

  After we cleared the table and I washed the dishes from brunch, neither of us had anywhere to go and we weren’t in any hurry to get there. I brought the laptop over to the couch, I thought I should at least show Cane what I wanted to buy before I asked him for his credit card number.

  He put one arm around me, pulling me close to him and we balanced the laptop between us. It was hard to think being so close to him. So far, Cane had acted like a perfect gentleman. Of course, he’d flirted. But so had I. We were teetering on the next step, and it terrified me. It’s not that I didn’t want to do more, but I hadn’t told him everything about our herd yet, that we completely saved ourselves for our true mate. He was going to assume I had more experience than I did, or any experience for that matter. And he was probably used to women throwing themselves at him.

  “That stuff’s cute.” He approved my purchases. I picked out some leggings and long T-shirts, and some other basic stuff, nothing fancy. I’d even found a coupon code. “But I’d like you in that, better.” He pointed at a mini dress in the next column.

  “Sorry, I’m not one of your groupies.” I pushed his leg. “I’m trying to be practical.”

  “And I’m trying to have some fun.” He picked up a beer I didn’t see him take out of the refrigerator and took a long sip.

  “Don’t you think it’s a little early for that?” I hated the words as soon as they came out of my mouth. It sounded so judgmental, but it was barely past noon.

  “No.” The word was clipped, and in case he didn’t get his point across, Cane took another sip. “It’s five o’clock somewhere.”

  I put my hand over the bottle. I’d seen so much of this behavior at The Roadhouse. The lonely people with the same look in their eye Cane had any time Ransom was mentioned; they came in at lunchtime and stayed well into the afternoon, drinking until whatever it was they needed to drown away was gone. Since I’d been here, he’d drank every day. “Did Ransom drin
k?”

  Cane sighed and looked away from me as we both held the bottle. “Of course. We all did. It’s not a problem. I wanted a beer, Chloe.”

  “I know you’re sad.” Ransom’s ghost was practically in the room with us. “But you don’t have to go down the same path, Cane.”

  His face darkened, and I worried I’d said too much. I’d only known this guy for a couple of days. And I didn’t know his friend at all. Maybe it was that simple, he wanted a beer. But I doubted it. He raised an eyebrow. “Make it worth my while to stop.”

  My heart pounded. “How?”

  Cane let go of the bottle, leaving it in my hand. “I don’t drink for twenty-four hours, from right now,” he pulled his phone from his pocket so we could both see it was twelve forty-three. “And I get to kiss you.”

  I opened my mouth to protest, to tell him that I really shouldn’t be kissing anyone who wasn’t my mate, because my mate was my true love, but he’d already told me how ridiculous that all sounded. Cane smirked at my lack of answer. I knew if I didn’t take the challenge he was going to drink all the beer he had in the house to spite me, and the fridge was full of it. “Deal.”

  He held out his hand to me. “Shake on it.” I put my hand in his, and he brought it to his lips, brushing them against the back of my hand.

  His beard was so soft. His lips weren’t half bad, either.

  Chapter Six

  THE COUNTDOWN WAS ON.

  The beer sat untouched in the refrigerator, and all I could think about was kissing Cane. My hand still burned from the place he’d brought to his lips. His beard still tickled my skin. I put my other hand over it, hoping the sensation would go away, but it was no use. He was under my skin.

  “What do you do?” Cane set the guitar down on the floor, and he’d grown bored of watching his football game reruns. “When you’re not—”